Rediscover Yourself: The Journey to Connecting with your body

When was the last time you genuinely connected with your body?

When was the last time you truly indulged in self-care, loving and accepting your body, flaws and all? How often do you stretch your body, reaching high above your head and flexing and pointing your toes as far as they would go, taking deep breaths and releasing them with a heavy sigh? Have you ever laid still on your back and let your body sink into the surface beneath you? Have you explored your body in ways only you and your partner do? If these activities seem rare or non-existent in your life, it's time to change that. Making self-care a priority is healthy for your mind, body, and soul.

Feeling disconnected from your body? I will list some sensual and gentle ways for you to easily reconnect to your body using your five basic senses. These activities help you reconnect with your body and promote relaxation, self-awareness, and a sense of well-being.

Sight –

Turn off or dim your lights and light some candles. Candles come in all shapes, colors, and sizes. It would be peaceful to get an array of various candles to sit around your space and watch the flames dance and flicker once you light them.  The soft, warm glow creates a sexy ambiance. Of course, be careful since you are working with fire! While you are trying to reconnect with yourself and invite a bit of coziness into your home, you do not want to invite your local fire department too.

Grab a handheld mirror or place yourself in front of a full-length mirror. Take time to look at your body. I learned how to do this as a young teenager by reading articles about sex and women’s self-empowerment from magazines like Glamour and Vogue. Those articles taught me that the body is beautiful, unique, amazing, and something we, as women, should never be embarrassed about. As we age, our bodies change from nice and tight to sometimes more spread out, flabby, or jiggly. This is the only body we get, and change is inevitable. If you have lost or gained weight, changed your eating habits, fought an illness, carried and given birth to a child (or two or three…), worked out, then stopped, or started working out again, your body will change on you.  Take that mirror and look at your body as it is. Appreciate its beauty, love it, touch it, and even talk to it. Thank your body for all it has done for you. If there are some positive changes you would like to happen to your body, take this time to commit to making those body goals come true. You owe it to yourself!

Be your own photographer and hold a small photo shoot. Put on your best outfits and lingerie on, or get ‘buck it-nekid’ and strike a pose! Show off your best assets, whether they are your legs, your eyes, or your ass. Be brave and bold, and have fun! You can keep this photo shoot to yourself and create a private file on your phone or in your email for only you. Sashay Shante!

Change up your scenery. You may want to start with your bedroom and make it the sexiest space in your house. Purchase some new pillows, bedsheets, and comforters, and add a little spice to it by changing the color scheme. If you are on a tight budget and making purchases is not something you can do right now, then rearrange the furniture in your room. See what you can throw away, give to charity, or put somewhere else in the house. This changes the energy and gives you something fresh to see. It may make sleeping more comfortable, too. Make sure to make your bed every day when you wake up and to keep your room clean.

Smell –

Start with your favorite scent or the scent your partner cannot get enough of when you wear it. This would be a great time to pull out some scents you have not worn in a while or to shop for something new to add to your collection. Do not go overboard on spraying your favorite perfume or oil all over your body and clothes. Spray scents onto your pulse points. These places would be the inside of your wrists, inner elbows, below your belly button, behind your ears, and the back of your knees. These are considered warm spots on your body that heat up and naturally diffuse your scent. Remember, too much is offensive.

Purchase some aromatic fresh flowers. Any local grocery store has flowers for on the low! You do not have to spend a fortune on fresh flowers, of course if you want, you are more than welcome to do that. Put them in a beautiful glass vase and inhale the aroma throughout the day. They can sit in your kitchen or your bedroom, or if you have a home office you want to add a little love to, flowers would be the perfect thing. Let the natural smell fill up your space.

Aromatherapy with a few drops of essential oil can make any room smell fresh and new. Some scents, such as peppermint, invigorate the senses. While scents like lavender, jasmine, or the warm smell of vanilla are more calm. Experiment with different scents. Breathe in deep and notice how you feel after taking in a whiff of each one.

While staying on a similar scent path, scented candles, and exotic incense can easily change a room's mood. There are so many scents to choose from, and you cannot go wrong. You can purchase scented candles from just about anywhere. From an expensive candle store in the mall and online stores to your local dollar store, you can purchase them by the armload without breaking the bank. Finding incense is just as easy. If you want your incense to be intentional, you can find various ones in a mystical-type store. Or you can find them at other local stores and annual ethnic festivals that come through your town.

Hear -

Create the ultimate playlist of sexy, sensual music that gets you in all types of feel-good moods! Get some old-school R&B from Teddy Pendergrass, The Isley Brothers, and Marvin Gaye. Add some neo-soul with Raheem DeVaughn, Jill Scott, and Maxwell. Throw in some Japanese Denim by Daniel Caesar, Oooh This Love by Al B. Sure, and By Your Side by Sade. Add instrumental music, and sit back and let your body feel every note that blesses your space. Reminisce, sing along, sway, and dance as you take in every lyric. Listen to how your body wants you to move in this moment.

Go into nature and listen to all of the sounds around you. How does your body feel when you hear the birds chirping back and forth with one another? Can you hear the buzz of bees quickly zooming by? Are you near the ocean? Close your eyes and listen as the waves crash against the shore or nearby rocks. Let the sounds of nature bring you peace.

Use a sound machine if you are not a huge fan of being in nature. You can listen to the sounds of the wind howling, the pitter-patter of rain hitting a tin roof, the crackling sound of wood burning at a late-night campfire, and so many other natural sounds.

Put on your headphones or earbuds and listen to someone read a sexy story or erotic poem. You can also listen to meditation music that includes soft bells, light chimes, chanting, and other sounds that vibrate your energy.

Taste –

Be mindful of what and how you eat. Take time to focus on how you prepare your meals and what ingredients you use. Choose lively, healthy foods, and let color and texture help you.

Savor each bite. Let tangy, tantalizing, juicy, or rich and decadent food linger and dance on your tongue. Chew your food slowly and allow each morsel to settle into your mouth. Eat food to enjoy it, not only to fill your belly.

If you love adult beverages, get your favorite wine or alcoholic drink. Or get a few new drinks you have heard about or want to try. Then, have a private tasting with your partner or alone and rank each drink from your best to your least favorite.

If wine and alcohol are not your friends, mix things up with a fresh juice tasting. Sparkling juices or fresh fruit you throw in the juicer. Try new flavors, add ginger to spice it up, or add a few vegetables to see how they make your tastebuds feel.

Touch –

Scrub up! Get a quality body scrub or make it yourself (let the internet show you how) and slowly rub it over all areas of your body. Watch for those sensitive areas! Then, feel how the water rolls over you as you rinse it off. Be in the moment as you dry yourself and feel the towel touch every inch of you.

Get a smooth or silky body moisturizer, lotion, or oil, and feel it when you pour a small amount into the palm of your hand. Feel your hands rub together to warm it up, and apply it to your body with a gentle touch. Don’t forget your face!

Give yourself a massage! Use warm, scented oils or lotion to gently massage your feet. Get between each toe, run your fingers down the middle of your feet, and don’t forget your ankles. Then slowly work your way up your legs, to your knees, your thighs, and all over. Use deliberate strokes to tune into your body and make you feel ah-mazing!

Look for something silky or satin. Try ultra-fluffy house shoes or super-soft and cozy pajamas. Wrap up in fabrics that feel so good you cannot keep your hands off yourself! Wear a textured scarf around your head or neck to lift your outfit and to touch throughout the day. Wear a sheer shirt that blows easily as you walk. You can keep that for home only if you are too shy to go out.  

This is a journey of reconnection, self-acceptance, and embracing where you are in life and who you have become. Explore, grow, and celebrate the beauty of YOU!